Power With Control
The Dynamics of Power and Control
What is “power” and what is "control"?Most people have an intuitive notion of what these two terms mean. The intuitive ideas reflect a wide range of opinions on power and control. Many people desire power and the perceived control that accompanies it, not necessarily because they want to control others but as a search for autonomy. The perceived meaning of power has resulted in power and control linked to different motives: such as those that lead to people hurting others. The two concepts concurrently have been used to explain the origin of many things becoming synonymous over time. However, power and control are entirely different concepts exceeding the stated motives. Power and control have emerged as social forces that shape interactions and choices made in interactions.
Power is the right to govern or rule or determine: power implies the possession of the ability to wield force, authority, or influence; power entails more to service. The reason beings and people have more strength than others is to serve others. Strength and power are two different things, as strength encompasses character traits or skills that are considered positive. Power is every human right, as service is every human right. The ability to impact change is power, and that is service. Power is, therefore, neither good nor evil: its use is up to the wielder, hence bringing control into the equation. Control is the power to influence or direct behaviour or the course of events. Control is born from an individual choice, to either govern with love, thus free will, or to govern with greed, hence, control. Love is the ultimate form of selflessness, and greed is the ultimate form of selfishness. The synonymity of power and control is so deep that people even argue that choice is an illusion created by those with power for those who do not possess it. The statement means that one believes there is no such thing as a choice; in existence.
A choice is an act of choosing between two or more possibilities; it, therefore, comes from the fact that we have free will. We have the freedom to Will our own lives, choosing the path we want to take. The different paths are a consequence of the existence of love. Love is selfless and can’t seek its own way, thus offering the choice to accept it or not. Greed is selfish and insists on its way, resulting in control. If one’s way is insistent, there is no other way but their perceived way. Free will is removed from the equation when one is selfish, resulting in control. Establishing control limits is not practical as the root of it is selfishness; you will find yourself trying to control everything, including others' free will.
Methods people use to control have become more complex over time. However, the commonality is that such people dwell in a metaphorical bubble of their own beliefs, which can be contradictory if scrutinized. Everyone is looking for security, a grounding that is sustainable and secure. Such a bubble seemingly provides a sense of security that one tries to ground themselves in; the issue is whether the bubble is sustainable. People give locus of control to different things, especially if they believe they need control. The belief that you need control means that even when you can’t control, you will give control to something else in your life. One can give up control to impulses, societal structures, finances, desires, thoughts, feelings, groups, family, other individuals, religion, science, etc. When you do this, that thing becomes your guide and ground for your beliefs. You build beliefs around what you have given control over. So even what is true will be dependent on what you have given control to, forming a bubble. Bubbles will develop when you believe that the answer to grounding is controlling.
Thus, the complexity of breaking a bubble is that one can also try to create another bubble as a defence, even when you develop awareness that they don’t work. The realization that one has no control over anything causes an internal struggle, not for power but for control. One can even struggle with existence itself, wrestle with it, trying to prove a point that you need or have control. The realization that you can't control doesn't mean you will stop believing that you need control. Often this requires one to seek the truth as to why control is not sustainable. If there is no desire for truth, you shall not find it, even when it is right in front of you.
Control is not sustainable because of what it entails. For one to attempt to control, you have to hold a belief that you can control. To believe you can control means that you believe you have the means to do so. Having the means to do so means that you think you have information that you can use to control. The origin of control is gaining information and the belief that you can use the information to get what one wants and desires. The issue, however, is how sure are you that the information you have acquired is the absolute truth?
You can have information about something or someone, but that doesn’t mean you have its/their truth. There is no truth in knowing only information; the truth is from an in-depth understanding which comes from being patient and kind with something/someone. Once you deeply understand something, there can't be a bubble as such an understanding is undisputable. The bubble pops as the information that is its foundation is not the truth. Therein lies the challenge; popping the bubble means you will have to give up control. Control and truth do not go hand in hand. Control arises from a lack of an in-depth understanding, the lack of understanding of why it is. To have the complete equation, one needs to understand its meaning and purpose.
Control does not facilitate an in-depth understanding, thus, leading one to make assumptions. Assumptions became protection from being wrong about what you believed to be true. You lose your free will when you fall into control as you fall into selfishness and randomness. Understanding something means that you have to be selfless as you focus on understating its existence, not how you can use it. Someone with control will take partial information from the truth to use it for their own motives. That’s why someone can break down qualities of love or other concepts and then reject some aspects of it to suit their own needs. That’s why we take things personally when someone hurts us, as once you deeply understand what happened, you will automatically forgive as you realize it was never about you. Hence why people have made relationships a game and parenting a privilege. If you can take information partially, what cant you justify?
That is also why one can link power and control. Such a presumption means that power goes hand in hand with control; power is control, and with such a belief, how can you not assume that a creator wouldn’t be controlling. We project outwards what we believe and are. Taking information in part can lead one to look for reasons and explanations that lead them further away from the truth. Therefore, the bubble can get complex. At its core, truth is simple. If you are used to complexity, how will you believe the answer is simple. The sad thing is that control can start with an individual, but even groups who share the same need will rise to form a larger bubble.
The paradox is that when we embrace control, we kill our ability to will our own lives. When you decide to control, you believe your fate is in your own hands. However, how can you be sure of this when you have no complete understanding of outside existence and who you are? Understanding who you are is the first and most critical part of being liberated. Existence is never self-seeking. We project to existence what we do and what we have become in that moment. The liberation of understanding comes from its truth; how can you be controlled by anything when you have an understanding of it? How can you control other things when you have understood them? Control is not the answer, as it leads people into randomness and further from the truth. Power does not control; it is for service.
Free will entails choosing between knowing in part and understanding in full. Understanding the truth will mean one realizes that they don’t need control; they only need truth.